Everyone has their limits when it comes to the porn they watch. Over my years of surfing the internet, I've encountered some messed up videos. Here's my list of the top 5 most non-arousing genres of porn.

Scat - erotic arousal from acts of defecation or ingesting a partner’s feces.

I think this would be at the top of most peoples' lists. I'll never understand how a guy can get a boner from something whose smell leads to a physiological gag reflex. I wonder if there are rules when it comes to poopie porn? What's the ideal consistency, color or texture? Are poo porn stars on a strict "no corn" diet?

Snuff - a sexual act that involves the death of a partner.

Yes, you understood that correctly. It's commercial availability remains to be somewhat of a myth but there have been instances of people practicing this in real life. Armin Meiwes (aka Der Meztgertmeister, Master Butcher) put an ad out on the internet in German that read: "Looking for a well-built 18 to 30-year-old to be slaughtered and then consumed." A man approached Armin and consented to be killed in this final act of eroticism. Armin cut off the man's penis, sautéed it (he claimed it was too tough). The result was a burnt penis that was fed to the dogs. The sex slave, hopped up on schnapps and sleeping pills, was stabbed repeatedly in the throat. There's nothing left of his body because, when the "sex" was over, Armin ATE HIM!!! The German metal group Rammstein later wrote a song based on Armin (Mein Teil).

Hairy - a woman who abstains from shaving her arms, legs, armpits or (mainly) pubic region.

I get fully grossed out when I find a hair in my soup. So you can just imagine how I’d feel when I find ten thousand hairs in a fish taco. I salute the brave men who must go down there, bite the bullet and give Chewbacca a French kiss. If feminists had their way, guys would be coughing up more hairballs than cats.

Diaper - one partner wears a diaper and pretends to be an infant while the other plays the role of a caretaker

How is this not one step away from incest? The goal of this eroticism is to accurately reproduce a scenario where an innocent infant is coaxed into engaging in a sexual act. Are we to assume that these people find baby behaviors sexually arousing? When you look at an adorable baby laughing as he makes a fluffy in his diapers and you get a boner, please move far away from my neighborhood.

Emotophilia - involving gagging and/or vomiting.

From my experience, vomiting and gagging is where the arousal comes to an absolute halt. When that drunk flirty chick runs off your lap to go yak, she stops being hot. When your girlfriend is going down on you and she suddenly starts gagging and turns red, she stops being hot. If that increases your desire to ram a cock in her then you might have some built up hostility towards your girl that needs to be worked out. That's my list.

Do you have a list of your own? What are your top 5 unwatchable porns?

Cool Hand Luke

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